06 November 2009

Muslim American Creates Foundation to Save Children from Violence

Father transforms grief from son’s murder into powerful social action

By Ahmed Mohamed
Staff Writer

Washington — How does a father cope with his son’s murder at the hands of a gang member? Muslim American Azim Khamisa, an international businessman in San Diego, found the answer by establishing the Tariq Khamisa Foundation (TKF) in 1995, a foundation named after his son that works to reduce community violence among youth.

“I wanted to do something for Tariq, to do something for my country, and to do something for myself,” Khamisa said. “If I had not forgiven, I would have remained a victim myself, and there is no quality of life remaining for a victim.”

It all began in San Diego on the evening of January 21, 1995, when 20-year-old San Diego State University student Tariq Khamisa was shot and killed by a 14-year-old gang recruit while Tariq was delivering pizzas. Azim Khamisa did not respond by demanding revenge and retribution. Instead, he saw two young American sons lost — one to death and one to the state prison system.

“What if I became a foe, not of the boy who killed my son, but of the forces which led him to kill my son? What if I reached out as far as I possibly could and devoted myself to fighting the plague of youth violence?” Khamisa asked.

Khamisa took a spiritual journey that led him to forgiveness. On April 7, 1995, 10 weeks after Tariq’s death, he drove to Mammoth Mountain in Southern California to spend a few days in solitude and reflection. “I knew Tariq was at peace, even though I was not. I began to understand that to find peace for myself, I needed to find something that I could do for Tariq, for his journey,” he said.

To turn his son’s death into something meaningful and to honor Tariq’s life, Khamisa reached out to the grandfather of his son’s assailant. “I told him that I felt no animosity towards him or his family, and that I believed both his family and mine were victimized by this tragic incident,” Khamisa said. “I was pleased to discover in him a faith as strong as my own, and a similar burning desire to end the plague of youth violence.”

Together, Khamisa and the assailant’s grandfather have spoken to tens of thousands of schoolchildren through TKF’s Violence Impact Forum. This program focuses on the power of forgiveness in an effort to break the cycle of violence.

TKF has developed a number of other programs for reducing community violence and providing a peaceful environment for children. These include:

School Programs: TKF’s school programs educate students about the effects of violence and empower them to make positive choices. For example, through the 16-week program Circle of Peace, elementary and middle school students learn skills such as anger management, sensitivity to cultural differences and public speaking. Students also dedicate themselves to promoting peace on their campuses by serving as positive role models. TKF also offers a 12-week program, Ending the Circle of Violence, that focuses on the story of Tariq Khamisa, his assailant, and the choices their families made.

Peace Empowerment Project (PEP): This three-year, privately funded grant program hires full-time PEP coordinators to implement comprehensive TKF programs in a selected cluster of schools. Each coordinator is based at a specific school site and incorporates TKF programs into the daily curriculum and culture of the school. TKF has teamed with the San Diego State University College of Arts and Letters to create an evaluation of the project. The intended outcome is to change the behaviors of students receiving TKF programs and shift the school climate toward a more peaceful environment.

Parent Peace Coalition: This 12-week curriculum gives parents a safe haven in which to discuss the ways violence affects their children and to uncover pathways toward its prevention. Members focus on a particular topic and then act as a group to help directly address the violence affecting their children and their communities.

Hope Works: The Hope Works Mentoring Program is a pilot project designed to reduce gang involvement and community violence. This initiative uses a prevention strategy to address problems before expensive and harsh solutions are needed.

More information about the Tariq Khamisa Foundation is available on the organization’s Web site.

See also the America.gov multimedia collection Alternatives to Violence.